The typical BPD female and NPD romantic relationship pairing goes through these stages:
1) Love at first meeting
2) “Mirroring” by one or both to make them feel like a perfect fit.
3) All sexual boudaries are removed and explored in attempt to secure the relationship.
4) One or both decide on impulsively, eager exclusive agreement to be beholden to one another…even if they both continue to have other relationships goin on in opposition to the agreement they are pursuing.
5) Sudden reasons to get married or move in are brough tup by the BPD who is abandonment sensitive and wants to seal the deal. Pregnancy fraud and even paternity fraud is often discussed in this context.
6) a child is born and the NPD may or may not temporarily worship his magnificent act fo making a human in his own image. He might be wowed by the miracle of birth and take a sense of meaning from the miracle of life.
7) Now with house, child, dog, cat, cars and commitment, the BPD often flips the script here and attempts a military style coup on the NPD and leverages the children to take power. This may be the first time the BPD has ever felt like they have power and leverage in their life…and it can launch maddedning initiatives by the BPD to sabotage the relationship.
8) One or both parties resumes straying from the relationship.
9) The NPD, if cheated on will hold this grudge forever as it has dentied his ego. The BPD will hoover and suck him back in with gymnastic sexual postion offerings – anything to keep him intersted…and he will fall/settle for it in the absense of other narcissistic supply. “I wont take you back, but I will have this new form of sex you are offering me suddenly.”
10) They either reconcile or break apart, but both are usually codependent in some form and let it drag on. Neither party is ideal intimate relationship materiel nor emotionally fulfilling as a mate. Neither is satisfied nor grateful for whatever they have for very long.
They say the male NPD is no match for the game level of the BPD and never see it coming. The NPD may or may not deserve this kind of abuse to be reciprocated back on to them, but either way, the NPD is not well-equipped to deal with the relationship sabotage, nor the power grabbing coup that occurs once the BPD has leverage and splits the NPD to black (see “splitting”).
If the BPD cannot find a new partner to replace the NPD, the will recycle the NPD if they can. BPDs do not like to be alone. The hypersexual NPD usually falls for the sex offers, so this can go on for quite some time as the two try to put it back together, but neither secretly wishes to be back together and both are biding time hoping another offer arrives soon from a new love interest. And they blow-up and make-up and blow-up and make-up over and over and over.
The BPD can control a bad boy NPD, but as soon as he falls for it, the BPD will despise his weakness in allowing her to control him and she will split him black forver.